I am here today, in this way, because I need to apologize to you. I failed you. Although I did not lie to you in words, I lied to you which i thought wouldn’t matter to you. I never meant to ruin the relationship which mean a lot to me.
I know you’re not talking to me, but I hope you’ll read this. I am so sorry for being a jerk. It was a stupid thing to do with stupidity. When your call comes, it drives me nuts. I know you don’t mean anything by it, but I’m so insecure when it comes to your love. I know, anyone in your place would see the way you saw.
You have come into my life at a time when I needed you the most. We talked about so many things that I started to realize my heart and my soul was totally attached to you. You placed comfort where there was fear, confidence where there was doubt, a shoulder where tears could fall and completeness where there is emptiness. I want to hold onto this so badly that I did whatever it took for you to notice. What I didn’t realize was that I could not do even a small mistake to lose myself entirely. I want to be the one who would be there when you needed to talk. I want to be the comfort for your soul when the world is too much to handle. I want to be strong for you when everything else seemed impossible. I want to love you in only the way you deserved to be loved, my love for you was and is pure, I like you the way you are.
This is no excuse, but please understand that I’ve never lived this life before. I’ve existed under the caring yet ruling period of my father for long years and then came you into my life, you has given me a new perspective—to live my life through your eyes. All the things that I told you about how I felt and how you make me feel are true. Nothing else mattered to me except hearing the laughter in your voice when you were happy. Just to be with you i can do anything and i can go for a kill to see the smile on your face. You made my days easy to get through and my nights at peace, looking forward to another day, even though distance separates us just being was enough.
I cannot retract what I did. I can only offer infinite apologies and a promise to never again leave our friendship unguarded. I’m sorry for hurting you and if I had to do all over again I would have been 100% with you.
If I have been half the friend to you that you’ve been to me, then I ask you to forgive me and hope that you’ll atleast consider it.
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